Happy New Year, um, yeah, in February!?

This was a beautiful sunset out my
window!  I saw a DOUBLE
rainbow one day... and it wasn't
even raining....

(I started this post one of the 19 days I spent in the hospital..and am just going to post it NOW, as it was a draft for the past two weeks....)
As I sit here and reflect on the past year , I am humbled with the fact that so much has happened...yet everything really is very much the same. We started off the year (2013) in a rough way and ended it by mirroring it, almost.  

New Year's Eve 2013, Mom was visiting and we were set for a quiet evening of watching TV and, of course, the BALL DROP, but by 8:30 I was feeling very tired and hot.  I had spiked a fever of 103 and just wanted to go to bed. So I did!  When I awoke, I was stricken with the flu.  Anyone in their right minds know that when you have the flu all you want is your own bed and own pillow, surrounded by the ones and things you love in your OWN environment.  So, I figured it would run its course and I would feel much better in a few days.  

This was on Christmas Day....2013

The best part of my 19 day hospital stay....2013

When Kevin brought Vessie to see her Mama!2013

2013

Meanwhile, during the 7 days ensuing, my mom and Kevin both got the flu and we were all a sorry bunch of folks... not wanting to eat or move or do anything other than just lie around and moan and groan commiserating with each other.  Finally, the time came when it worsened---instead of getting better for me, Kev insisted that we go to the Emergency room and check into good, 'ol Club Med.  I probably would have sooner had my doctor been in town, but I was hoping I could wait it out till he got back from vacation as things are much easier when you can be cared for by the people who know you and KNOW what to do. So, dragging in on my last thread, I was admitted and only discharged 21 days later... at the end of the month. I thought I would never recover, fully, and it took me almost three months to get the stamina and breath back like it was before. 

One of the many visits with my honey!

Life went on.  I was intending on participating in another Reggie Ezell year which started in January, but after evaluating my situation and endurance, there was no way that I could do that class another, whole year.  That was definitely a disappointment 'cause I learned and grew so much during that class (2006) when I studied with him each month. 

This was the BEST card I got while in there
and I got GOBS of cards..both
Christmas and Get well!
Do do deee day do! Musical!
Made me WANT to dance and
certainly made me smile or laugh!

I still held my positions at Capital City Scribes... website, distribution list, Newbies and scholarship... as well as taught both a program and a mini workshop on Flourishing (although one had to be postponed from February till April) for the guild.   I also was honored to teach at the Houston Retreat at the end of '14.  That was a fun time, but challenging just the same as my energy level has succumbed to a much lower gear...sometimes requiring oxygen just to walk around with any exertion.



In addition to my health having such a bad hit, it was a very hard year for me as we lost another CFer whom I had come to know and love for almost 20 years.  Jane Murry went to be with the Lord in July and it was an utter shock. You just never know when it's someone's time, but she battled CF for over 60 years and her body was ready to throw in the towel. She fought this disease with the best of 'em.  I will miss her as I miss all those who went before her. She was a great inspiration to me and a great "cyster". 

We had many visitors including my mom and her beau, my sister and brother in law, my cousin from Hawaii and Best Friend from Phoenix.  It's harder for me to travel all over the place, which proved true when I attended a pointed pen calligraphy conference in New Mexico over the summer.  It was much more difficult than I thought it would be due to the altitude. (A mile high)  I even THOUGHT I prepared for it, bringing with me my portable oxygen and contracting with a local Medical Supply Company to set up a whole room oxygen concentrator at the hotel, but it proved to be one of the hardest things I have ever done... going it alone. I was left breathless most of the time and if it weren't for one, very helpful and caring friend there, I probably could not have done as well as I did.  I knew it would be hard, but not THAT hard. I see my limitations starting now, more so, than any other time in my life.

Yes... I was a loony bin in there!

 August rolled around and with the inferno of the Texas heat.... we felt it.  Kev's last day at Dell Computer company took place when they let over 200 people go and cut Kevin's job once again.  He had been there for almost 6 years and although it wasn't his favorite place to work, it was a job and it had very good health insurance.  That is most important, even more so than salary, when it comes to having a chronic disease like CF.  We certainly were sweating bullets during that time and as upbeat as we tried to stay, it was a very depressing time to look for jobs and never know if it was ever going to happen!  The older you get in the computer world, the harder it is to find jobs.  If you don't have the exact skill, even though you've proven that you can adapt and overcome with your 25+ years of experience in that field, they don't even want to consider you.  Luckily, only 2 months after the day he was laid off, he was hired at an awesome company which has lead him to grow even more and become more valuable in the future with additional, newer skills which may be needed if he ever finds himself in that situation again.  The company is a very well known one in the industry called Emerson Process Control.  It's a world leader and Kevin really likes the work as well as the people he is surrounded by.  Right now, he is just on a 6 month contract, but is hoping that he will be hired on permanently in the very near future... or at least, have his contract extended for another 6 months. In the world of insurance coverage, though, it leaves us a little uneasy thinking of our future.
 

My Leenda.. who endured not one, but TWO
Double Lung Transplants!  She is my hero!
My cyster forever.

Leading you to this... I have considered getting a double lung transplant over the past couple of years and had a consultation with some folks at a transplant center.  It's a very complicated evaluation which you have to endure just to see if you can even be a candidate. It's filled with lots of grueling and extensive tests as a process to get you into the system.  They have to make sure you are psychologically as well as physically (in all organ areas) ready to take on this huge challenge.  It's not for sissies.  I honestly never thought I would get one, but when you get to the point where you see your life slipping away from you and a chance to make it "good" again, even though you have to make some sacrifices, there comes a time when you have to reevaluate your thoughts and decision process.  I'm sure at some point, there will come a time when I am ready to quit fighting, but I am not there yet. 

So,  with that said... I am at the two week mark in the hospital after spending Christmas in here with the flu AGAIN, for the second time.  I came  in for just a quick "tune up" to get my lungs in better fighting shape for the new year and contracted the flu as well as having to have had another surgery to get my port replaced.... I am not all the way better yet, but I have more work to do during this stay, as I have in the past. It's tough, but I am tougher. 


Luckily, I have the best hubby in the world. He is my Rock and I am his.  I have family who are there for me and friends to boot. I am blessed... and my faith in Him never falters. 

ALL Above was written while I was still in the hospital... below is just an update... How did it become February already!?

Leenda, my Cyster...

Well... as you can see.. I wrote this the first week in January. I am on a charted course now, for a possible bilateral lung transplant.  A lot of paperwork, phone calls and insurance to doctor, doctors to insurance talks have happened and it looks like I will be getting an evaluation at the Houston Methodist Hospital in early March.  I am getting all my ducks in a row. at least, and trying to just move as quickly as I can.  I am not sure what my future will bring, but for the sake of curiosity, I am moving forward.. instead of being in a state of flux or stagnation.  I have faith that whatever happens will be right for me. I am at a perfect calm in either getting it done or not.  I know that God has a plan for me and if He is not through with me yet, then I will proceed in the direction He wishes me and guides me to go.  I hope that I won't take so long to post next time... but stay tuned... Tootles! 

The only FUN outing I have been on since being released from the hospital...2014
It was a friend's wedding in New Braunfels..on Jan. 25th.  This was a photo booth!

Valentine's Roses!